Exhausted

Lama gla x sentuh laptop..last skali aku guna laptop aku hri ahad pstu,aku xde masa nk bukak laptop..balik umah, mkn, tgk tv pastu tdo pstu bgn pg keja...cmtula 5 hari aku berlalu..agak penat la..kasut aku dh koyak terok gler. haha...aku ada kasut lg kt umah Shah Alam tp aku xde masa nk ambik so biarla..sepupu aku suroh guna kasut dia,even nk try kasut sepupu pon xde masa..so, boleh tgk la aku bz cmne kn..huhu..

hidup aku skrg, bdpan dgn customer je hri2..tp aku suka...itu meningkatkan lagi aku punya ability untuk communicate dgn org..bnde tu penting utk masa dpan and at the same time i can earn money to pay my debts..hopefully aku dpt duit lebih sket bulan ni,so that aku bley simpan utk byr hutang, simpan utk blnja sebulan n byr sepupu aku...kesian de..huhu...ambik hntr aku hari2...huhu..aku plak x reti drive..huhu....agak pyh utk seorg berumur 22 tahun utk bergerak xde lesen..huhu...dhla xde lesen,drive pon x reti..huhu...

aku hrp suma akan berjalan lancar..huhu..aku harap suma hal selesai bulan ni..aku mls nk pk byk2 since aku penat gler..

huhu...hope that next week is another week for me to enjoy earning money for life..i love money...wwee!!

Baking Life

I am very tired of working but i am very satisfied even though i damaged 3 cakes and i am very terrible in english (yet i still have the guts to write in english)..I am sleepy but i have to wait for my vampire diaries to finish downloading..

I can't wait for tomorrow because my boyfriend is going to see me. I miss him so much though i just met him last thursday but we used to see each other every day, so 3 days is like 3 weeks.

Okay stop talking nonsense.

My work is more or less like Baking Life Facebook game just that there is no kitchen involved. I meet with different people everyday. i used to think that rich people is rude and ridiculous but i was wrong (sorry rich people!). Well, i served the eldest daughter of Malaysia's first prime minister for almost 3 days now.

Ok, saya tahu saya agak sakai dlm hal2 begini namun, saya lebih suka berjumpa dgn org yg pnah serve negara rather than celebrities. (KENAPA AKU GUNA SAYA?)..haha..aku xtau la..aku xbley nk download brg kalo aku x bgn..fhm x mksd aku? sukatila kalo x fhm pon tp yg pasti aku msti hbskan episod 1 ni kalo x, watpe aku tunggu lama dr pukul 11 td..huhu...

just want to say that i miss my boyfriend so much..huhu...

Bingung

Aku benci jd org dewasa sbb terlalu byk bnda aku kena fikir...especially psl umah..especially dealing with people...seriously, people is the most difficult thing to deal with..aku x lrt nk guna duit aku utk cover duit sewa...aku x lrt...tolongla seseorg ringankn beban aku ni..duit aku byk abs utk cover duit sewa je..huhu...aku hrp la semua berjalan lncar..sbb aku nk fokus kerja, byr utang n guna duit yg ada utk tampung kehidupan aku ni..huhu...one day,im going to find one house which i dont have to deal with any of these anymore...

I may look dumb, but i dont live far away from home for nothing

Seriously, aku mmg la nmpk cm bodoh. Aku mls nk ambik kisah psl bnda yg aku rasa xda kena mengena dgn aku..so, bla aku ckp aku xtau,bukan mksd nya aku xtau...aku tau cuma aku mls nk masok cmpur psl org. So, x pyhla nk ckp aku ni xtau pa2..Ko ckp mcm tu as if aku ni bodoh sgt nk fhm psl hidup ni. Ko sape? Setakat ko kenal aku dr kecik n ko ingt aku ni naif sgt psl hidup, xyhla ko nk judge aku n bg malu aku kt dpn org ramai. aku mmg xde function utk sape2 dlm life ni. but i try my best to be somebody so that one day, people will respect me for what i really am. Dh cukup aku rasa aku ni menyusahkn mak ayah sbb aku std jaoh dr umah n parents have to send me money every week so that i can eat, u dont have to make it even worst. aku moral down gle kot sbb apa yg ko ckp.

aku ambik iktibar dr apa yg jd kt kwn aku. experience ni bukan limit utk pengalaman yg ko experience sndri. mcm2 la jd dlm hidup aku ni, x pyh ckp la pe. apa lg yg org x pnah buat kt aku? mntak jaoh la yg plek2..tp setakat ni, aku dh rasa mcm2 cara org treat aku. ko ingt aku ni bodoh. ko ingt aku ni budak yg kalo pg hentak kepala kt dinding aku bley ckp 'aku nk lg,aku nk lg'.

jgn la drag boyfren aku skali. biarla de nk mcm mat skema pon. kaco hidup ko ke? ko bangga la kalo kwn dgn samseng muka parut2? tolong la..aku dh tau byk sgt org cmtu sbb pe aku nk bkwn dgn org2 cmtu? jgnla judge org ko x knal lgsg..cukupla ko buat kt aku. sakit ati aku. sian kt boyfren aku kot. ko x knal de,jgn ckp mcm2. hormat la sket. ko tu dh tua. hidup pon bukan betol sgt kalo ko nk ukur hidup ko dgn laptop yg ntah pape n hp ko yg canggih tu, u dont have to. i know people who are better than you. FAAAARRRRRRR BEEETTTTEEEERRRRRRR THAN YOU.

i dont like to talk nonsense. if i want to say this on your face, i can. it's just that i respect you as a person who i have known for so long and you are older than me. i hate you seriously. do you think that people care about what you? you are just an attention seeker.

i know im not like anybody else. i dont have nice cellphone or laptop or what so ever. i dont know how to drive. i am totally useless. you dont have to make it worst. why do you have to care what music i listen to. you have a guitar but you dont know how to play a guitar; that is so stupid.

i hate you. i hate you. i want to finish my study so badly so that i can prove to you that i can survive by my own without anybody's help. you dont know what i have been through living away from home and you can say that i know nothing?????????

mampos ko lg bagos!

Confession

She told me, she has a lot of things playing in her mind. She has gone through a lot of problems all year round. She said she has committed too many things that are intolerant. Pity her. There are too many sins she has involved in yet she can't move away even a step from all these things. I think, maybe now is not the right time.

She wants to be somebody that does things accordingly. She wants to be somebody that she really proud of. She wants it so badly but she can’t. She has no idea why she can stop doing aberrant things. She keeps repeating the same mistake over and over.

What she really hopes right now is one day she will repent. I will pray for her.

P/s: Don’t start doing things that you will regret. You will never stop until your deeds hit you.

Kecewa

Aku kecewa bila org2 kt sekeliling aku suka merendah aku walaupun aku x kaco hidup deorg...haish..aku kecewa bila aku dibelakangkan oleh org yg aku salu depankan (betul ke?)mksdnya...aku kecewa bila org yg aku salu utamakan,x utamakan aku..aku kecewa bila aku x buat pa2,slumber ckp aku ada buat pa2...huhu...aku xtaula..aku kuat komplen kot...aku salu ada ja x betol dlm hidup aku..huhu..aku nk pg berasap kt bwh,aku takut ada perogol...huhu...ada anjing ke..huhu...

x semestinya aku diam,aku bodoh..
x semestinya aku muda,aku naif..

banyak org ingt aku ni mentah...mungkin pada pemikiran...sbb aku mls nk pk byk sgt...aku rasa, biarlah aku fikir setakat aku nk fikir..setakat aku rasa aku boleh hidup dgn pemikiran cmtu...pk byk sgt,susah gak..sapa ckp aku x pk byk..setiap mlm sebelum tdo,aku susah nk tdo sbb aku pk byk bnda...walaupun pakcik aku pk aku muda,mentah..dia ingt aku ni xtau byk bnda...mmgla,kalo nk bndingkan dgn de,apala sgt pengetahuan aku ni..kurg2 aku x bising2 mcm tin kosong..bg aku psl org2 tua ni,cm x penting utk aku...de cm childish je aku tgk...de ingt de tua,setiap bnda de wat tu btol la?de ingt d mata aku,nmpk hebat la...come on la pakcik..im 22 years old and i live far away from home..how about you? aku susah aku senang, cuma mmber2 aku je tau...de tau x?no no no....aku ni mmgla dependent tp x suma bnda aku nk mak ayah aku buatkan...jgn ckp aku xtau pa2..aku tau,cuma aku mls nk ckp..aku rasa tindakan de tu mcm budak2...x mcm org tua yang berumur 40 tahun...ee malu la...tolong la pakcik...grow up...ingt suma org suka ko ke?

aku ckp aku xtau,sbb aku mls nk interfere psl org2 tua..org2 tua ni sensitif...ckp sket kecik ati..pstu yg muda2 ni yg kena...de xtau,de pon silap jugak...kta ni x pnah lepas dr wat kesilapan...sbb aku mls nk ckp pape...kejap lg..msti aku gak kena...aku tau..skrg aku xde pe...aku student je...tp aku rasa suma student experienced life mcm aku...sakit perit aku suma aku simpan sorg2...aku kongsi ngn mmber2 aku...aku x ckp ngn mak ayah aku sbb aku xnk deorg susah hati..tp suma org fikir aku ni suka susahkan org...dependent...aku student..aku x knal sapa2 kt cni...mana lg aku nk cari tmpt mntak tolong kalo x kwn2 aku...mak ayah is my last resort..huhu...x cukup duit,aku try wat article..tp org tipu plak..huhu...skrg wat article 1 seringgit pun jadilah...

apa deorg fikir aku ni?sepupu aku yg tua setahun je dr aku,org dh respect de.aku ni ntah bla la nk dpt suma tu...pndai mana pon aku,xda org pk apa aku ckp tu betol..apa yg aku suggest deorg xnk ambik tau...huhu..xpe...sbr je la...

aku suka tulis apa yg wat aku sedih kt cni sbb sal uada mmber aku...skrg de praktikal..so,xde org nk dgr..huhu..dialah pendengar paling setia..biarpun de dh tdo,de bley bgn kalo dgr aku nangis..huhu...susah nk dpt mmber cm de..huhu...encik semandin pon x wat aku cmtu..huhu..

ntahla..aku byk komplen sbb aku ni insan yg x bersyukur kot..tp korg bacalah...korg rasa aku ni x bersyukur ke pe?ke xde kaitan lgsg..ahaha..xpelah..biarlah deorg dgn kehidupan deorg sndiri...

p/s:never once in my life to receive any flower from any guy..i wish i can have one..gudnite anyone...

Do Not Walk Away

This is about a story about a friend of a friend of mine. Her relationship with her boyfriend is easy to describe. They love each other like the couples in typical love story but when they hate each other, it is like tornado meets volcano. When they argue, they hit each other like the Eminem's latest song with Rihanna. It sounds terrible but what can we say about it? This is their relationship; I am afraid that their relationship can't stand longer than what I expected. The girl never stop trying to stand for the relationship they have build for two years and the boy keeps quitting.

Come on dude, if the girl can stand the way you treated her when you both argue, why can't you? She doesn't care what people talk about you when you hit her, why must you care and pretend that you afraid after all that you had done to her?Not even one time she hates you when you hit her, why must you hate her so badly when she did the same? After all, she did that because she is standing for herself. Why must you run away when she wants to talk to you if you are a man? She never stop trying and she expect you to do the same.

So, the moral of the story is please don't walk away when you have a problem.